Tin man
Production information


Date created

Because of some twat

Technical specifications

1.8 meters?


Masculine(?) programming

Chronological and political information


"Oh, my, goodness gracious me! I'm a gay man's golden fantasy!"

Goldenrod, aka C-3PO, was the easily combustible automaton which was emotionally attached to Luke Skywalker and his clan. His bosom buddy was frequently R2-D2, who on more than one occasion Goldenrod attempted to have relations with. At nights when R2-D2 powered down, Goldenrod would often attempt to upload to him farcical hologram messages involving various members of the galactic aristocracy pleading for rescue.

He was pessimistic, and so annoying nineteen people shot him down at the same time. These nineteen were awarded medals for eliminating this irritating shit . When things had a chance to get better for the rebellion, he started telling the HUGE odds against possibly winning any battle. Nobody ever liked him. The only thing more annoying that him would be Jar Jar Binks. Many times he would end up in pieces. If the enemy didn't shoot him eventually, his allies will shoot him so he could shut up. Possibly he was an accident, a freak of robotics. His creator must have worked smoking some kind of intergalactic weed or something.


Because he was so annoying and distracted people enough to lead to their destruction, miniatures versions of Goldenrod are given away to folks that are equally annoying or distracting. He was also remembered for his charging of golden showers.

Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on C-3PO.

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