"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWEEEE iveneverhadsomuchenergyinmylifehaveyouyesnomaybeplease expandIimploreyouheyiknowletsgorunamarathon - noletsconquertheuniversehahahahahahblah."

―Imperial Officer after six cups too many

Coffee, or caf, was a beverage loaded with caffeine. It gave Dark Lords of the Sith the energy they needed to embrace the darkness.

Some Sith believed that coffee was evil, so they stuck to tea. Tea was wholesome and loaded with healthy antioxidants, but it did not wield the potential for power that Coffee did. Tea soon became jealous of Coffee. Coffee knew that tea was plotting to betray it. So when Tea was sleeping, Coffee crept into its room and slit its throat. Coffee, covered in the spilled leaves of its enemy, declared, "Now I am Dark Lord of the Sith."

Sith Lord UsersEdit

"Yo, Wyyrlok! Get me a double-double, stat!" -Darth Fanon

This article is called Coffee. Coffee has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Coffee can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.