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Conversation of Palpatine and Pfilbee Jhorn

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Conversation recorded during Palpatine's inspection of Endor shortly after Pfilbee Jhorn's expedition report.


Palp-conv1
*sniff sniff* Augh, what IS that? Trees?



Pfilbee-conv1
Sure is, sire. Get used to it.



Palp-conv2
ACK, I think I'm going to be sick. Let's get this over with, Sergeant.



Pfilbee-conv1
Happy to, sire. Now the Ewok village is about twenty kilometers to the west; I did bring along some flesh-eating bacteria canisters, if you wanted to maybe release them in their—



Palp-conv2
Bah! Forget it! They're no threat to us. Waste of time. What else ya got for me?



Pfilbee-conv2
Well, we're also about twelve kilometers south of the marauder encampment. Now, we might want to—



Palp-conv1
Wait a second! Who's that?



Charal-conv1
...



Palp-conv3
Mmm...



Charal-conv2
...



Palp-conv3
Gooooood...



Charal-conv3
...



Palp-conv4
Oh my yes...



Pfilbee-conv1
Um, sire?



Palp-conv5
That woman. Who is she, Jhorn?



Pfilbee-conv2
Oh! Uhhh... That's Charal, sire. The Dathomiri witch from my report.



Palp-conv3
Beautiful and evil? ...I must meet her.



Charal-conv4
Who dares approach me?



Palp-conv3
The name is Palpatine. Perhaps you've heard of me. Emperor of the galaxy?



Charal-conv1
Indeed? Well, Emperor Palpatine, you have the distinct honor of being spoken to by Charal, Witch-Queen of this god-forsaken moon. You have come to serve my desires, have you not?



Palp-conv4
Oh yyyes. Ah ah ah.



Pfilbee-conv1
Sire, we should probably be moving on...



Charal-conv2
What's his problem?



Palp-conv6
Shut UP, Jhorrrrrn!...
Palp-conv3
...Ah, nothing, nothing, my luscious black blossom. He is merely one of my pathetic toadies.



Pfilbee-conv2
Sheesh...



Charal-conv1
Perhaps you should send him away?



Palp-conv3
Yes, yes, you're quite right, my dear...
Palp-conv5
...Get back to the ship, Sergeannnt!



Charal-conv4
Now then, let us retire to someplace more ... dank and subterranean.



Palp-conv4
Ha-haaaaa! You got it, baby!



Pfilbee-conv1
Sire, I am charged with your protection.



Palp-conv6
I don't need your protection, you bootlicking sack of piss! In case you haven't heard, I'm the fucking Dark Lord of the Sith! Now scram before I zap your worthless hinder back into the Draggulch Period!!



Charal-conv4
*sigh* Can't even control his own minions. You bore me, so-called Emperor. Come back when you're a real evil sorcerer.



Palp-conv1
...She's gone.



Pfilbee-conv2
Fine by me. She's kinda creepy.



Palp-conv6
*grr* ... *gargle* ... *clench*



Pfilbee-conv1
No need to thank me, sire. All in the line of duty.



Palp-conv5
Yesss... Your new duty, Sergeant, will be solitary confinement on an orbital mirror platform until the day you die.



Pfilbee-conv1
No! Anything but that, sire! ...Bust me down to custodial service on Tatooine!



Palp-conv2
NEVER!


RicOlieRight
This article is called Conversation of Palpatine and Pfilbee Jhorn. Conversation of Palpatine and Pfilbee Jhorn has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Conversation of Palpatine and Pfilbee Jhorn can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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