Count Forkula

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He was exactly like Count Dracula, aka Vlad the Gaybanger, instead he used forks, he wanted to dominate the island of Forks he had an army of forks which he often employed, he wanted to overthrow Queen Forktoria, he had a long list of forks he wanted to kill off, most notably Van Forking, and some guy named Bram Forker wrote a long novel about the life of Count Forkula in the form of diary entries supposedly written by eyewitnesses who came into close combat with the legendary count.

Count Forkula had the three legendary Forks of Forkula who served as his hos. He would sit on top of a throne of skulls, naked, while his Forks crawled over him, also fully naked. As they themselves were 30 year old bitches, this is completely understandable.

Count Forkula was remembered throughout the Galaxy as being complete and utter shit.

This article is called Count Forkula. Count Forkula has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Count Forkula can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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