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Eat your planet

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"I'll eat your fucking planet!"
―Darth Fat Guy yelling at his TV.

Eat your planet was when a Sith blew up a planet and ate it in many different meals. This was a hobby for Darth Hale. Manaan is the one planet you literally can't eat, because it's just...water. It's a good idea to eat Kashyyyk, because it comes with free toothpicks. In some distant, make-believe universe, Rosie O'Donnell loves eating planets.

HistoryEdit

One day, Padmé Amidala was destroying a planet while she was pregnant. Suddenly, she started having cravings and decided that she'd eat the planet. Getting a fork (while saying "Fork you" to that retarded pirate guy) and a knife, she flew out to space, sucked all the remains of the unknown planet (it was Pluto, people, but we wouldn't know that, since it was deemed some stupid star and not given shit about) into her ship with a giant vacuum, and ate it with some Shu Mai.

Eating planets became very popular after this. Darth Vader loved eating planets, along with many other Sith and Barack Obama. Guri, however, did not like eating planets, because all of the people doing it were too busy eating to look at her (and man, was she hot). So, deciding that this was the only way to get attention, Guri went out and ate one of those stupid Yavin planets. All the guys (and some girls, presumably Darth Azula) thought that this was extremely hot, and they started drooling over Guri again. The dumb bastards. Didn't they know that Guri would never love them?

Monica Lu Wampa was pissed off by this new tactic, because she had no way to destroy a planet. So, taking her stunning body to some random section of Hoth, she decided that she'd eat the snowy planet with some cookies. Monica started eating (and in a very sexy way) away at the frozen retard of a planet, but soon got a massive brain freeze, and she decided that she'd give up. For now.

Jemima Butterworth had tried to come up with ways to eat planets in recipes. She'd gone from eating Kashyyyk with ranch, to eating Hoth with sprinkles, even trying to eat Manaan with some mashed potatoes (but that got waaaaaaaaay too wet). Jemima, after a shitload of failed recipes, decided her idea was dumb, and went back to what she usually did.

A group of strange vegans went experimenting and destroyed Dantooine. They then proceeded to eat the planet, and discovered that not only was it a healthy vegan meal, but it was tasty!

Famous QuotesEdit

"Awww, bitch, you better not eat that planet without no gravy!"
―Jemima Butterworth
"Hungry Observation: Master, it appears that you just destroyed that planet. May I eat it?"
HK-47
"Ima let you finish, but Beyonce had one of the best planet meals of all time!"
Darth Ruptus
"Grrrrrrwahhhhhhhhhhwwww!"
―Monica Lu Wampa
"A planet is a heart attack on a bun!"
Darth Squidward
"Mmmm...planets...hehehehe...heh-heh...HAHAHAHHA!!!"
Darth Homer
"[Censored, because this quote was so hot!]"
Guri
"...."
Kreia's boobs

Did you know...Edit

  • ...that leftover parts of the Galaxy Gun were used to make a giant planet shish-kebab?
  • ...that Chewbacca ordered a dish of Sernpidal with a side dish of moon from the best Vong cuisine chefs in the galaxy?
  • ...that Tatooine ate itself? (please don't ask, we don't know how)
  • ...that Darth Homer ate his own planet?

See alsoEdit

RicOlieRight
This article is called Eat your planet. Eat your planet has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Eat your planet can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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