- "They say that men try to make their way in the Universe. It's not true. The Universe makes way for
Chuck NorrisGeorge Lucas."
- ―Some fanboy ripping off a Chuck Norris Fact
George Lucas is the all-powerful, all-knowing creator of Star Wars. All should bend the knee before him. He is more powerful than God. More powerful than SuperShadow, in fact. He is so powerful and so wise he could influence the fans to create Star Wars. Ironically, he could save himself from Disney, but not the movies.
Lucas has been criticized in recent times for
fucking obvious abuse of his supreme authority over the entire Universe. If he sneezes, the Galaxy could be ripped apart by black holes or some other shit.
Some believe that Lucas has made shitty attempts to place himself into the story. This is obvious. He sold Star Wars to the company Disney, who will use it to help take over the world. They then killed him so he wouldn't reveal their plan.
Any one who dares criticize him will have their prized continuity annihilated! Seriously.
Creation of Star WarsEdit
According to legend, George Lucas came up with Star Wars when he was eating a TV dinner watching some Sci-Fi show. As this was before recorded Star Wars history, the only account of this was written millennia after.
- "And so, as George Lucas ateth his TV dinner, it dawned uponeth his face as he slapped a mosquito from his ear. And so he spoke, "Let there be fight. Let there be war and conflict in a galaxy far, far away. Let there be an evil Empire with shitty leaders. Let there be a big ball that bloweth up other balls. Let there be hot female Twi'leks and ugly male Twi'leks. Also there must be a fucking large amount of extraterrestrial species that shall be oppressed and fucked by the humans. Let all the other guys come up with everything else."
- ―The Star Wars Origin
The odds of history happening that way approach 99.999999999999999%. Further passages in the book describe him retrieving the "10 Star Wars Commandments" from a writer on a mountain in the middle of the
desert Tatooine, which cover the most important principles of Star Wars, such as hot female Twi'leks, the principles of an evil empire, Revan, and the Schwartz Blortz Force. He sold his masterpiece to Disney and they killed him afterwards. Disney went on to make a Sequal trilogy, a story about the Death Star plans and ones about, Han Solo, Ewoks, Elom and finally Motti.
George Lucas FactsEdit
Throughout the Star Wars Origin, numerous references are made to George Lucas's "Fucking Awesomeness". These statements have led us to conclude that George Lucas is truly more powerful than God and definitely SuperShadow and can fuck any shitty piece of crap he pleases.
Chuck NorrisGeorge Lucas has a vacation home on the Sun. (This proves that George Lucas can not only bend the laws of logic, but is incredibly heat resistant.)
- Apple pays
Chuck NorrisGeorge Lucas 99 cents every time he listens to a song. (This proves that George Lucas can only gain and not lose.) Chuck NorrisGeorge Lucas has sued Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you. He won the case and one googol dollars ($$), forcing Myspace to spam commercials and beg for donations to barely remain intact. (This proves that George Lucas can destroy the universe.)
These statements easily prove that George Lucas is the almighty.