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His knee is staring at you. Yes, at you.

"Death to the false Power Droid!"
―A Gonktrooper

Gonktroopers were the dreadful and fanatical soldiers of the insane Darth Chaotic. They constituted the backbone of his army, the Word Bearers Legion. Vicious and extremely loyal to their master and their Deity, they were ones of the most frightening soldiers in the entire galaxy. They participated in the every single one mission of Darth Chaotic during the the Dark Gonk Crusades, bringing the redemption for the unbelievers with the swords and the flames.


Every Gonktrooper possessed a heavy, cortosis alloy armor, which was impenetrable for small-arms fire and highly resistant to the lightsabers. This proved to be a significant advantage, as Word Bearers met the hippie resistance several times.

The soldiers were armed with Gauss sub-machine guns. Their bullets were accelerated to supersonic speeds and they could not be deflected in any way, thus being a perfect weapons against lightsaber-wielding opponents. Gonktroopers also usually carried a sword as a backup weapon, used when fighting in close quarters.

Basically, they were an example of quality over quantity, a polar opposite to the Empire's tactic of dispatching painful amounts of cannon fodder, who could not hit anything besides insignificant Rebel troops.


This article is called Gonktrooper. Gonktrooper has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Gonktrooper can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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