Great Hyperspace War

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A group of Republic Soldiers fighting on Coruscant.

The Great Hyperspace War was a really, really big war that happened a really, really long time ago and it involved the Sith Empire and these Republican idiots. The conflict was the Hyperspace's most important job of the year, and the Galactic Republic were having trouble going into hyperspace, because the Sith Empire and his crew where hogging it all to themselves. So, like the whiny babies they where, the Galactic Republic declared war against the Sith Empire, and well, that's how it all got started.

The really special and great thing about this war is that it never just stayed on one planet, like the Galactic Republic usually make it, it was on different planets and millions of people where dying! The Sith Empire was worried he might die to, so he put on a Shadow Suit so he wouldn't be found and his side can beat up the Galactic Republic.


Golden Age Of The SithEdit

Somehow, the Sith was defeated in some even older Jedi crap. So he was mad, and well, back then the Sith Empire had anger issues. So he tried looking for the Galactic Republic on Korriban. Meanwhile, Dark Jedi where little pussies, so they had to take pills that made them into normal people magically! The Sith Empire, lets get back to him, found the Galactic Republic playing around in Hyperspace. Then he had an evil plan. He ordered all of his friends and neighbors too take over Hyperspace and kick the Galactic Republic out. So that's what happened. They weren't too happy, so they declared war against the Sith, which caused him to have an evil smile become stiff on his face, like an erection! Meanwhile, the Dark Jedi finally got to stop taking their pills and join the Sith in the epic war!

A "shocking discovery"Edit

A few minutes into the war, two idiots driving a car singing while crashing into a lot of tree's and driving on the sidewalk, crashed into Korriban. They discovered a new secret Hyperspace, and of course, they didn't really know what it was. They then decided to play truth or dare like a couple of idiots, and one dared another to go into the Hyperspace. So that idiot did, and on his threw the Hyperspace, he ran over Marka Ragnos. His coworkers Naga Sadow and Ludo Kressh were riding their bikes at that moment and saw what happened. They soon learned about the current war and went to tell Naga Sadow and Ludo Kressh all about it. Naga and Ludo where really excited and decided to join the Sith Empire. Ludo wanted to start by brutally assassinating the two idiots, but Naga didn't want to because that would be mean. So Ludo shot him. Ludo locked the two idiots in Naga's house and attempted to blow it up. Sadow's sister also tried to help Ludo out. They did blow up the house but one of the idiots escaped. He had to escape the angry coworker by jumping into the Hyperspace he found earlier, so he was really exited. However, as soon as he jumped into Hyperspace, he unleashed a massive fart which defeated Kressh's flagship that was just flying by to bring Kressh into battle. Angrily, Kressh jumped into that secret Hyperspace so he could kill that idiot. The two of them where let out of Hyperspace in the middle of the battle and this distracted everybody. The two of them then started punching each other and the Sith Empire and the Galactic Republic tried to be mediators. So the Sith Empire took Kressh and the Galactic Republic took the idiot and soon Kressh joined the Sith Empire and became the next Sith while the idiot joined the Galactic Republic.

Sith invasionEdit

Kressh was a good leader and destroyed most of the Galactic Republic sites, and pretty soon, the Sith Empire side was winning the battle. However, he started over doing it by putting a giant eye right next to a red star. That made the Sith Empire so proud. However, the Galactic Republic where on there way to the Sith Empire's secret base with a giant bomb when they walked pass the eye. Them and their anger issues they screamed like little kids and violently attack Kressh and the Sith Empire. The bomb fell on the Galactic Republic's base accidentally, but they didn't really care. So Kressh ran away, and on his way saw Kaikielus, Forest Shipyards and Coruscant and planned to do big things with them. He sent out halves of the Sith Empire's army to all of those planets and massive wars happened on all of them. Kressh then ran home and locked himself in his basement, thinking that he didn't have to fight anymore. However, some Younglings went on his lawn with some water guns. So he just went outside and stole their water guns and sprayed all of them, and they ran away like little pussies. Then he became furious of the Galactic Republic and once again, started violently killing lots of them and an even bigger war occurred. Meanwhile, the idiot snuck out of the battle and went into a graveyard. He found out that his naked grandpa can defeat the Sith Empire. He found his naked grandfather's grave and his naked grandfather jumped out and headed over to defeat the Sith Empire. On his way, he ran into Kressh, who furiously got into a fight with him with their lightsabers. The naked grandpa was defeated and at his second memorial service, the Sith Empire side prepared a surprise attack and destroyed a lot of Rebels again.

Battle of CoruscantEdit

On a plain on Coruscant, Pultimino's soldiers fight against Massasi Warriors. Jedi Oroo led the battle. Another Victory for the Republic!


After a long time of fighting, the republic had finnaly won the war. However Naga Sadow fleed to the remote planet of Yavin IV. There he used his evil sith magic to build Aztec-looking temple's. (Why did he built temples?)

Later conflictEdit

The New Official Star Wars site

Symbol of the Great Hyperspace War

This article is called Great Hyperspace War. Great Hyperspace War has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Great Hyperspace War can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.
Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Great Hyperspace War.

Alternately, the Great Hyperspace War was a conflict waged by, when it reorganized its website, causing thousands of pages of content to disappear from the archives, including exclusive Hyperspace content that users paid subscriptions to view. This was probably also Naga Sadow's fault.

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