- ―Jax Pavan 100,000,002
He was the saddest Jax Pavan. Of all the Jax Pavans on Coruscant, his life was the most tragic. Worst of all he knew this. This had a very negative impact on the poor fellow's life. Why, you shoulda heard him – even as this article was written he was saying how people wouldn't notice him because he wasn't the exact 100,000,000th Jax Pavan. Or they would notice him because his number was way too close to being 100,000,000 and then Everyone (who reads Darthipedia) would know what a loser he truly was and that he was a virgin.
First of all Jax Pavan 100,000,002 had no mommy. Aww! And he had no daddy! Awwwww! He did have a pet tauntaun, but it died. Awwwwwwwwwww! He even had a girlfriend, but she lost him in a sea of Jax Pavans once and forgot which number he was and tried to look for him and got pwned by Jax Pavan 3. Dayam, dude!
At long last, when he couldn't take it anymore, he even tried to have his planet destroyed, but he was living on Coruscant, and no one would destroy that, there were just too many high quality whore houses on the planet. So that didn't work out either. Poor schlep!