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Jax Pavan 66

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This article is about a Human male named Jax Pavan who lived on Coruscant. You may be looking for one of the 582,797,753 others.
Clonetroopers
CT-066/Alice/Lord Deartheromanthador, the Infecter of the Vile with the Pestilential Power of Being/Jax Pavan 66/ST-066
Biographical information
Homeworld

Kamino

Born

Mass produced

Died

Like a man, a well-fed, fat man

Physical description
Species

Mandalorian

Gender

Male

Height

average, exactly average

Chronological and political information
Era(s)

Send in the Clones

Affiliation

Clone Army,Jax Pavan

Known masters

Palpatine

He began his life as Clone trooper CT-066 but soon became tired of life as a clone, living mechanically and being treated like he was just a number. So he decided to become a civilian and take on the name Alice. Which worked swell, but was missing a certain something. So for a while he tried Lord Deartheromanthador, the Infecter of the Vile with the Pestilential Power of Being. But it was just too flashy. Ultimately he realised that though he loved his new found individuality, there was such a thing as being too individual for his taste, so he went down to the local Jax Pavan registry office and became Jax Pavan 66. And that felt just right.

Jax Pavan 66 escaped from his barracks one morning while stationed on Coruscant. He quickly found his way to the deep and odorous Coruscanti underworld where he took on a job as an assistant bar-keeper at a local pub. His integration into civilian life was surprisingly easy, owing to the fact that no-one had ever seen a clone trooper without a mask and therefore didn't know who he was (although on a couple of occasions he got into violent bar-fights with aliens who mistook him for a bounty hunter and wanted their money back.)

Order 66Edit

All was well for Jax Pavan 66 until the issue of Order 66. Jax Pavan's dormant clone programming erupted into an uncontrollable desire to turn on his master (who was a Coruscanti barkeeper if you remember) A well aimed blaster shot through his bosses thigh and a few trips to illegal holo-clubs to shoot virtual Jedi eventually helped him calm down, but he suffered relapses whenever someone ordered menu item 66 in the bar (which was Blue milk and creamed asparagus, by the way, a truly grotesque combination in its own right) After the tenth time, having finally shot the barkeeper cleanly through the head, good ole '66 was declared criminally insane and taken to an asylum where he received extensive treatment for his condition. After finally over-coming his weakness, Jax Pavan was released and appeared on various Galactic talk shows like Zuckus and Oprah.

Re-enlistingEdit

Tiring of life as a travelling talk-show guest star, Jax Pavan 66 decided to re-enlist in the galactic military as a stormtrooper. He was selected by Palpatine himself to serve on the Death Star, 'cause Palpy's original plan was to have Jax Pavan 66 stand around until Luke Skywalker showed up, yell "Order 66" and end things there and then. No long speeches, no extended fight scene, no gushy Father/son moment, no nothing. However when the time came, all JP 66 could say was, "But sir, I am cured!" So Palpy had Vader toss him down the reactor shaft. Which probably saved his life, cause he hit the wall, entered a garbage shoot and was ejected to safety before the whole damn thing exploded.

Later YearsEdit

Having survived the Death Star, the weary old soul decided to live the quiet life and settle down. He travelled to a Star Wars convention and, passing himself off as a shorn Commander Cody, sought out the hottest Fangirl he could find married her and lived a happy, if at times violent and alcoholic, civilian life.


RicOlieRight
This article is called Jax Pavan 66. Jax Pavan 66 has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Jax Pavan 66 can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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