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Madclaw!

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"MADCLAW!!!"
―Soon deceased hunter

Wookiees were one of the most noble species in the galaxy, however there would always be those who would choose to walk a darker path. In case of the Wookiees this would be the Madclaw. A Madclaw was in essence a Wookiee with Tatooinian Rabies.

A Madclaw, adorable isn't he?
A Madclaw, adorable isn't he?

Contents

[edit] Symptoms

Symptoms included foaming at the mouth, pissing against everything, humping legs and an uncontrollable urge to PWN everything and anyone in sight, even Rancors, Krayt dragons and entire units of stormtroopers.

[edit] What to do when encountering a Madclaw

"Run bitches, run for your mothafrakking life!!!!!"
Mace Windu evacuating a town plagued by a Madclaw
"Go chew spice, ya bald ol' bugger!"
―Town plagued by a Madclaw to Mace Windu
"*eats everyone*"
―Madclaw

The only way to stop a Madclaw was Option one as described in the Sith handbook on alien encounters (Chapter: Wookiees) , or in some Extreme cases Option two.

Dumb Sith who did not bother to read the Sith handbook on alien encounters would often try to use Force Lightning on a nearby Madclaw. However, this would only arouse the target and would end in Wookiee-Nookie 99% of the time ( the other 1% would commit Seppoodoo in fear of the horrifying Wookiee-Nookie). Dumb Jedi ( who were not allowed to read the Sith handbook on alien encounters, since Sith lore was forbidden to them) would use a Jedi-mind trick on the raging subject, they did not fall victim to Wookiee-Nookie, instead they would be beaten to death with their own limbs.

[edit] Cure

There is no cure you moron!! Once infected with Tatooinian Rabies, a Wookiee will be a Madclaw for he rest of his life, however, in boring times or times of need, a regular Wookiee could become a Madclaw for short amount of time when he consumed large portions of Corellian Ale, Spice, Deathsticks or Caffeine (no that's not a planet).

[edit] Notable Madclaw's

Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookieepedia's "real" article on Madclaw.
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