Malachor IX was the IX ruler to bear the name Malachor of which he was the IX ruler to bear. He was, much to his displeasure and his schoolmates' confusion, the daughter of Good King Malachor VIII and Bad Queen Malachite CXIV. Being a globular non-sentient of silicon persuasion, Malachor (IX) never amounted to much nor did anything. This made sense for obvious reasons. Nevertheless, he was trod upon by a good many famous galactic beings.



"Be a good little planetoid and eat your minerals!"
―Malachite CXIV to Malachor IX

He was... a rock? A big rock anyway, species lived on him, you know. He became rather miffed about it when Czerka Corporation enlisted a colony of badgers to mine him for ore. This traumatic experience lead to his antisocial behavior and rebel attitude during his teenage years. But he was still a rock so he did not accomplish much.


"Why can't I go be a vandal? Everyone else is! I hate you!"
―Malachor IX to his mother (Malachite CXIV)

He was a pimply rock. Sentients had more difficulty living on him. But he was still a rock so did not accomplish much.

Old AgeEdit

He was an old rock. To pass the time he took up flatulance and soon could perform the Blue Danube solo. Because of this, more and more inhabitants left him to start life elswhere. But he was still a rock so he did not accomplish much.


Darth Animal Chopped him in half in his quest to join Sesame Street putting him out of his misery. Now he was two rocks. But he still did not accomplish much.

Place in LegendEdit

[See section "Childhood"]

This article is called Malachor IX. Malachor IX has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Malachor IX can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.