Malachor V, taboo planet of unstable green Jell-O.

"That way leads to Malachor V. We don't go there anymore."
Alyx Vance A random Mandalorian

Malacor V was, apparently, the fifth planet in the Malachor system. A very unstable world due to its core being made of extremely volatile, acid-green Jell-O that glowed in the dark, it was avoided by almost anyone who had any sense. The Sith, particularly their super-secret offshoot, naturally chose this place to host a super-ultra secret training ground for those extra-special Sith Mega-Super-Overlords who were destined to become Dark Lords.


No one knows when Malachor V was settled, nor does anyone care. The only things known for certain were that: it was a taboo place to the Mandalorians; that Revan had visited the planet at least once, basking in its corruptive power and becoming a Sith badass; it was the site of the apocolyptic Battle of Malachor V; that Kreia went there looking for Revan and got corrupted herself; and finally, the Jedi Exile went there and PWN3D massively, tossing the old crone who had meddled with her life into the glowing green goop at the heart of that wretched place. Such was the end of Malachor; the planet, in the grips of Bao-Dur's Mass PWN Generator, exploded, spewing debris and gelatin everywhere.

This article is called Malachor V. Malachor V has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Malachor V can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.
Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Malachor V.

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