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Mynock Accidents

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"Mynocks. Why did it have to be mynocks?"
―Han Solo

Mynocks are commonly known as a species of parasites that feed on and absorb the energy of spaceships. However, they are less known for their role in the destruction of thousands of once-sturdy aircraft.

Mynock collisions with windshields of star destroyers, cruisers, shuttles, frigates, and other space ships are the single leading cause of air traffic deaths, up 4.7% from last year, in the galaxy. Although erroneously reported damaged as the result of an incident with Kyp "I was under the influence" Durron and the Sun Crusher, Admiral Natasi Daala's Gorgon was actually the victim of a midair collision with a pack of mynocks heading to Tatooine for the winter, thus plunging it into the Cauldron Nebula.

Ways to Avoid Mynock Collisions (provided by the Coruscant Department of Transportation)

1. Wear a helmet at all times
2. Use the buddy system
3. Stay clear of common mynock migrational routes
4. Fly the speed limit for your area of space
5. Fly casually

Other Mynock Collisions Edit

There are a number of other events that were likely the result of a mynock/windshield collision, but were covered up due to embarrassment and various conspiracy theories.

1. The destruction of the Eclipse - allegedly destroyed by a "Force Storm"
2. The decimation of the Khetanna - supposedly ripped apart by "laser fire"
Note: in this single case a mynock variant, which can exist in a planetary atmosphere, errantly flew into the windshield, rather than the ship hitting the mynock
3. The obliteration of the Executor - allegedly destroyed in the explosion of the second Death Star
4. The demolition of Jek "Belly Runner" Porkins' Red Six - purportedly lost in the Battle of Yavin

Scientists have started to theorize that mynock collisions may also be partially to blame for global warming.

RicOlieRight
This article is called Mynock Accidents. Mynock Accidents has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Mynock Accidents can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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