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Naydax Pavanman

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Naydax Pavanman
Biographical information
Homeworld

New Joisy

Born

Hoboken First National Hospital

Physical description
Species

Pregnant

Gender

Female

Height

5'6 when pregnant 5'7 and 1/2 when not pregnant

Chronological and political information
Affiliation

Sex Addicts Anonymous

Known masters

Octomom

Nadyax Pavan is the forty-seven year old mother of 582,797,754 Jax Pavans and counting on Coruscant. She’s like Octomom except a lot more. 72,849,719 times more. Yeah…I did the math. I have that much time on my hands. If you’re Darthipedian you do have a lot of time on her hands. The fathers of her children vary, but a lot of them were fathered by Jax Pavan Sr. Nadyax never had a miscarriage and many of her children became very successful. Overall, Nadyax had very successful life and is still going, living in a lush upper-Manhattan Park Avenue penthouse next door to Bernie Madoff who she thinks is, “a misunderstood genius”. Did I mention that Nadyax wasn’t very smart? In fact she never went to high school or college as she’s been giving birth to children since she was twelve. She’s given birth to twins, triplets, quadruplets, octopulets, piglets, and signets. She’s slept with, baseball players, football players, hockey players, soccer players, rugby players, and just flat down players. Crips, Bloods, and the mentally unstable. Pretty much everyone in the galaxy has slept with Nadyax. Even the last of the mohikans. Naydax’s “bush” has been breached many times. Many, many times.

Early LifeEdit

Naydax had a pretty good childhood. Her father was a semi-successful lawyer and her mother, a prostitute (guess how they met), but Naydax wanted to make her name known. Since she was too young to join the army and become a war hero, she turned to sex. No not like her mother. No, she would be the most prosperous woman in the galaxy. Posters of Octomom and Jon and Kate soon plastered her room walls. She turned to her crush…a pedophile Wookiee who would do anything to have sex. Naydax’s first five children were fathered by this Wookiee. They were not named Jax Pavan though; Nadax only gave birth to Jax Pavans after meeting Jax Pavan Sr. in the eighth grade. Together they had many kids. Jax Pavan Sr. supported the two and their children with his creation of the toothbrush in his freshman year. Naydax dropped out of the eighth grade to take care of her children.

Many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many, many childrenEdit

Together Jax and Naydax had many children. A few times though Naydax drifted to other men. And woman. And Wookiees. And Puppets. And Frogs. And sometimes Jax drifted, but just to other woman. Although…there was that time in Cancun…Anyway, Naydax and Jax would fight, kiss and make up, and have a few more kids. Everything was fine and dandy. That is until the Jax Pavan Purge.

The Great Jax Pavan PurgeEdit

The Great Jax Pavan Purge took place on Coruscant and was triggered by an order was sent out by Grand Moff Dan Horny of the Wikian Empire. Many Jax Pavans were to be slaughtered by Darth-2-D2. The Jax Pavans formed an army to fight back, but Darth-2-D2 was too strong. Naydax couldn’t do anything and was forced to watch in horror. Luckily, the Monks of Darthipedia are busy resurrecting them as quickly as possible. Especially that Goodwood freak, but that’s another story.

The Last ChildEdit

On July 23, 2008, Naydax announced that Jax Sr. and herself were expecting their 582,797,754th and final child to the shock of tabloids, gossip show hosts, and reality TV disciples. Presidential candidate at the time, Barrack Obama, congratulated Naydax and Jax, but left abruptly after he found out that Naydax had already endorsed Hillary. The child was born on March 23, 2009. It was male, like all five hundred eighty two million, seven hundred ninety-seven thousand, seven hundred fifty three of his siblings. Its name was Pavan, Jax Pavan. And it liked its formula shaken, not stirred.

RicOlieRight
This article is called Naydax Pavanman. Naydax Pavanman has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Naydax Pavanman can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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