Robinson Crusoe
Biographical information


Physical description




Chronological and political information


"I am monarch of all I survey,
My right there is none to dispute;
From the centre all round to the sea,
I am lord of the fowl and the brute.
―William Cowper

Robinson Crusoe was a sailor who spent four years as a castaway when he was marooned on an island, somewhere. During his lonesomeness, he taught himself the force,[1] and dreamed of destroying your planet. Robinson's dreams were destroyed because of his chronic weed-smoking habit. One perhaps might assume that if his addiction didn't stand in his way, he could have become a Jedi Master, even one of the greatest in the galaxy. When Crusoe finally did leave and return to his home world, technology had progressed greatly; which made him sad.[2] An hour later, Robinson met Patti Peeples, whom he would later marry.

Patti and Robinson completely owned the love and hate relationship. An argument that happened often was that Patti was taller than Robinson because she was Kaminoan. Another was the weed-smoking, which got Really. Old.

Patti's fateEdit


Mosaic done in Patti's honor.

"And here's to you, Mrs. Robinson,
Jesus loves you more than you will know.
―words on Patti's grave

Patti's death was very tragic and sad. She died from cancer of the throat — little is known other than that. Patti was a loved public figure in Tatooine, so the townspeople threw a large funeral for her. It included the common funeral traits, such as flowers, and on a side note: lots of sand.

Robinson did not attend Patti's funeral. We believe he had his reasons.

Life after PattiEdit

After Patti died, life was not easy for Robinson. He was not nearly as loved in Tatooine as his wife. He often contemplated about what it would have been like if his wife hadn't died, but lived. Robinson forgot about his weed-smoking, and left it to die as if it twas a child, yes, a crying child.

Two months passed, and Crusoe died suddenly from a case of acute appendicitis. Though simply a theory, it has been assumed that a contributing factor was perhaps intestinal worms. It is unknown where he might have picked them up.[3]

Robinson, My Love... My Life...Edit


A book written by Patti was later found, it has since been released in the public domain. An excerpt from chapter one is included below:

"I remember once, it was in the fall, I believe. A bearded man wandered through the streets as if he was a stray, without a home, and nothing to call his own. I pondered, shall I beckon my soul to catch the eye of a weary traveler? no, I mustn't though... but why? it was as if it were a dream. I looked into my soul, and found a hole... perhaps my thoughts had leaked? to discover my true thoughts on the traveler and to capture my kaleidoscope dreams I must meet him, soon... but not yet. I needed to listen to the voice I heard, and find myself... I was right there all the time, it was like my eyes were the sky, pondering the clouded notions and in an endless trance... of thought."


  1. 101 Things You Didn't Know About Star Wars.
  2. Robinson, My Love... My Life... written by Patti Robinson
  3. Marooned: The story of a sailor


This article is called Robinson Crusoe. Robinson Crusoe has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Robinson Crusoe can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

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