Shmi Skywalker Lars
Biographical information
Homeworld	Tatooine
Born	72 BBY
Died	22 BBY (dramatic death scene disease)
Physical description
Species	Human
Gender	Female
Height	1.63 m
Hair color	Brown
Eye color	Brown
Chronological and political information
Era(s)	Rise of the Empire era
Affiliation	Watto's shop
Known masters	Watto

[Source]

This article is called Shmi Skywalker. Shmi Skywalker has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Shmi Skywalker can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.

Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Shmi Skywalker.

"He's not the Chosen One, he's a very naughty boy!"

―Shmi Skywalker^[src]

Shmi Skywalker was the mother of Anakin Skywalker, living with her son on Tatooine. She could recall no man having participated in his conception, though fortunately, I'm going to rise above taking an easy pot-shot at Swedish girls at this point. Either that or have to comment upon, and subsequently receive an unpleasant mental image of, the idea that Darth Plagueis, the goth-faced Muun, played a part in said conception. Hmm, maybe that's why she claimed she had no recollection of who it was? Interesting. But, I digress. It's possible that Shmi's promiscuity would not have been called into question quite so much had she not been found shamelessly flirting with Qui-Gon Jinn during his stay in her hovel. And by "hovel" I naturally mean "house", so don't get any ideas.

She assembled Darth Stick Man back. She doesn't know that he is a Darth.

As soon as her son left with said hippy mage, Shmi bunked up with Cliegg Lars, and was later captured by Tusken Raiders. Tortured horribly by the savages, Shmi remained alive just long enough to wait for her son's rescue attempt, then promptly died before managing to tell Anakin how much she loved sand. Anakin then closed her eyes and avenged her death with a bloody slaughter, though it has been speculated many of the victims died from over-exposure to the inordinate amount of clichés crowbarred into the scene.