The ultimate showdown between Luke Skywalker, Darth Vader, and Emperor Bob Barker aboard the second Death Star.
We're back! And heading into our showcase today LUKE is in the lead! <applause>
And! Our runner-up is Lord VADER! <applause>
And as the leader, Luke, you can choose to pass or bid on our FIRST SHOWCASE. Rod?
Bob, our first showcase contains prizes reVEALED as we follow the lovely Guri on her next suspenseful MISSION!
It's a new BEDROOM GROUP!
You'll sleep your way to the top of the Black Sun criminal organization in this queen-size canopy bed. Plus mahogany hope chest, wardrobe, and droid recharge slot. From Broyhill! Okay Bob!
... Wait... That's it?
LUKE, would you like to bid or pass on this SHOWCASE?
<snort> Pass! And besides, I thought we were gonna talk about my father and my destiny and stuff.
<genial chuckle> All right, Lord Vader! What is your bid?
...One credit, Bob!
I wonder if your feelings on this matter are clear, Lord Vader.
That's my final answer, my master.
<head shake> All right, Luke, let's take a look at YOUR showcase!
Our second showcase follows the lovely Deena as she infiltrates a stronghold of the evil GALACTIC EMPIRE!
Aw Bob, you know I don't write this stuff!
Just cut to the prizes or I'll report you to the Imperial Bureau of Flamboyance Suppression.
You know I'll do it, Sequin-Boy.
Well, ah, okay Bob, um... Okay, there's a trip to Denon, uhhh, a sampler of fine Corellian ales... ah, here we go:
IT'S A NEW AIRSPEEDER! <applause>
Luke, what is your bid on your showcase?
Gah! Vader, you dolt.
Forget it, forget it. Normally we'd go to break here, but I think the winner is obvious... <sigh> Luke gets the friggin' showcase...
Shut the hell up!! Anyway, I'm Emperor Bob Barker, commanding you to help control the Jedi population; have your apprentice spayed or neutered.