From Darthipedia, the Star Wars Humor Wiki, currently editing over 582,969,943 articles
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| Simon the Killer Ewok
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| Biographical information
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| Homeworld
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Endor
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| Born
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A long time ago in a galaxy far away...
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| Died
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Never, he's a God, Remember?
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| Physical description
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| Species
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Care-bear
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| Gender
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Male
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| Height
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Very short
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| Hair color
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brown
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| Cybernetics
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- SAM launcher
- 108mm slugthrower
- Electronic bagpipe
- Coffee grinder
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| Chronological and political information
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| Known masters
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Himself, duh.
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| Known apprentices
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All the other carebears in his herd
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Simon the Killer Ewok was a sadistic and mentally deranged Ewok who racked up large killing sprees. He was particularly efficient against stormtroopers. Simon in battle was everywhere and nowhere, suddenly surprising his victims with a blast to the head from his staff before consuming them. He was effectively indestructible and praised by those Ewoks not worried about becoming his next meal.
[Edit] Behind the scenes
Simon played by Bill Cosby.
- Simon was portrayed by Bill Cosby.
Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read
Wookiepedia's "real" article on
Simon the Killer Ewok.