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Transformers

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Starscream
Transformer
Designation

Sentient[1]

Planet of origin

Cybertron

Height of average adult

Usually very, very tall

Hair color

None, usually

Eye color

Blue for Autobots, red for Decepticons, can vary for those who wear contact lenses

Distinctions

Can usually change in between two modes so that you buy their toys

"The Transformers! More than meets the eye!
Autobots wage their battle to destroy the evil forces of... the Decepticons!
The Transformers! Robots in disguise!
The Transformers! More than meets the eye!
The Transformers!
"
―National anthem of Cybertron

The Transformers are a race of droid lifeforms from the crap planet Cybertron. Originally only useful for changing the voltage of various electrical appliances, through God's influence, they later evolved into mechanical beings with the ability to change in between robot mode and an alternate mode by rearranging their parts (usually something like a truck, a tank, a jet, a Nazigun, an X-wing, a Y-wing, an XY-wing, a Wookiee, a Puppet, a Voldo, etc.)

Most Transformers are enthusiastic toy salesmen, and are more than eager to show you how cool they are so that you buy plastic-frozen replicas of them and play with them incessantly until the Transformer blows your head off.

The Transformers are usually divided into two factions: the Autobots, defenders of truth, justice and the American Way, and the Decepticons, homosexual Nazi sinners and rapists who want to destroy and conquer everything.

At some point in time, Darth Bay, an agent of the Empire, conquered the entire planet of Cybertron and gave each and every Transformer a major upgrade in every way, including weapons systems and physical appearance (more badass) so that Darth Vader would finally like them and decide to have them reprogrammed into serving the Empire. However, this alienated many Transformer rights activists, who declared that the species was "Ruined FOREVER".

ReproductionEdit

Despite the fact that they are droids, Transformers reproduce through sexual reproduction, which usually involves kidnapping an organic female and impregnating her (in many cases, considered borderline Wookiee-Nookie). One such instance occurred when Darth Megatron, together with Darth Darth Binks, impregnated Sophitia and made her give birth to car-sized twins.

Notable TransformersEdit

AutobotsEdit

DecepticonsEdit

ReferencesEdit

  1. and thus, they all deserve freedom. After all, Optimus Prime's motto is "Freedom is the right of all sentient beings." But the Decepticons are evil maniacs and don't deserve freedom! What shall we do? are excellent soldiers and serve the Empire well.


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