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Wookiee-Nookie

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Wookiee-Nookie
Wookiee-nookie
Conflict:
Date:

Anytime

Place:

Anywhere

Outcome:

<insert name here> got raped.

Combatants

Madclaw!

<insert name here>

Commanders

Wookiee Goldberg

<insert name here>

Strength

<insert name here>

Casualties

none

  • <insert name here>
  • <insert name here>'s marriage
  • <insert name here>'s credit
  • <insert name here>'s cornhole
  • <insert name here>'s other various holes
  [Source]
"OH NO, THE HORROR, THE HAIR, -UGH-THE TEETH, THE CLAWS,-AUCH-THE STENCH, OH NO, WHY ME?? WHY WAS I EVER BORN??SHOOT ME FOR THE LOVE OF HUMANITY PLEASE SHOOT ME, SHOOT ME NOW!!!!!!!!"
―Average Wookiee-Nookie victim

Wookiee-Nookie, or: Kashyyyk-fornication in Basic is a combination between PWN and making love, it would happen when one aroused a Madclaw! Every single person, even Kyle Katarn (Wookiees are known Katarn hunters), would commit some sort of suicide before, during or after Wookiee-Nookie. For example, when faced with the prospect of mass Wookiee-Nookiee, Gonzo shot himself. Wookiee-Nookiee was a fate worse then Sand People torture and perhaps worse then having your planet destroyed, the latter is disputed however. Kshyy vines were sometimes used by Wookiees who were also extreme bondage fetishists.

WookieeNookie Gunpoint

Wookiee-Nookie negotiated at Gunpoint

Wookiee Nookie SurvivorsEdit

The following is a list of confirmed and alleged non-Wookiee Wookiee-Nookie survivors:

Gonzoslaststand

Gonzo's last stand

Wicket

You gonna get raped

SecuraOggle

Oh my!

This page was NOT SAFE FOR WORK. Above this warning template you may find frank depictions or discussions of lewdness and impropriety that might have unfortunate consequences for your career if someone should look over your shoulder. Actually, that's true of all of Darthipedia. But even more so here.

If you can't resist scrolling, even just to take a little peek, and your sorry ass gets shitcanned as a result, don't come crying to us.

See alsoEdit

ReferencesEdit



RicOlieRight
This article is called Wookiee-Nookie. Wookiee-Nookie has been written from a simple, Ric Olié point of view. A non-simple version of Wookiee-Nookie can be read on Darthipedia. Darthipedia is the Star Wars Humor Wiki.
WookieepediaLogoBouncing
Born without a sense of humor? We are inspired by your courageous struggle. …Just kidding. Get the hell out of here and go read Wookiepedia's "real" article on Wookiee-Nookie.

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