Entertainment
 

Wookiee-Nookie

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Wookiee-Nookie
You gonna get raped
Conflict:
Date:

Anytime

Place:

Anywhere

Outcome:

<insert name here> got raped.

Combatants

Madclaw!

<insert name here>

Commanders

Wookiee Goldberg

<insert name here>

Strength

<insert name here>

Casualties

none

  • <insert name here>
  • <insert name here>'s marriage
  • <insert name here>'s credit
  • <insert name here>'s cornhole
  • <insert name here>'s other various holes
  [Source]
"OH NO, THE HORROR, THE HAIR, -UGH-THE TEETH, THE CLAWS,-AUCH-THE STENCH, OH NO, WHY ME?? WHY WAS I EVER BORN??SHOOT ME FOR THE LOVE OF HUMANITY PLEASE SHOOT ME, SHOOT ME NOW!!!!!!!!"
―Average Wookiee-Nookie victim

Wookiee-Nookie, or: Kashyyyk-fornication in Basic is a combination between PWN and making love, it would happen when one aroused a Madclaw! Every single person even Kyle Katarn (Wookiees are known Katarn hunters), would commit some sort of suicide before, during or after Wookiee-Nookie. For example, when faced with the prospect of mass Wookiee-Nookiee, Gonzo shot himself. Wookiee-Nookiee was a fate worse then Sand people torture and perhaps worse then having your planet destroyed, the latter is disputed however.

Wookiee-Nookie negotiated at Gunpoint

[Edit] Wookiee Nookie Survivors

The following is a list of confirmed and alleged non-Wookiee Wookiee-Nookie survivors:

Gonzo's last stand
You gonna get raped

Oh my!

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[Edit] See also

[Edit] References


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