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Despite being more famous than any other judge at the criminal courthouse in downtown Coruscant's legal district , Lance Ithor’s courtroom is also the hardest to find.
Each courtroom is adorned with a name placard outside the door with the name of its presiding judge. But on the ninth floor, Ithor’s placard holder stays woefully empty.
Since the bearded judge became a household name more than a decade ago while presiding over the O.J. Panaka murder trial, his placard has been stolen time and again. He’s tried replacing it, he’s tried gluing it, having it guarded by Nexu but the darn thing just keeps disappearing.
A few years ago, Ithor finally gave up. Those looking for his courtroom now depend on the information officer in the lobby to guide them there.
Facilities staff keeps no record of requests for placard replacements – possibly because the problem isn’t very common for other judges. But in an memo to a court spokesperson Ithor confirmed the thefts. The judge nearly declined comment for this article― as he has with virtually every other interview request since the Panaka trial made him famous― He did however release the following statement.
|Enough is enough, you all constantly ridicule me and my herd and to make matters worse my placard gets stolen over and over again! Those things are made of wood you know! How many trees to we have to sacrifice before this madness stops. From here on out I refuse to have it replaced ever again, You'll have to ask the nice guard for directions to my courtroom!|
He was lampooned on late-night Holonet shows, which regularly featured a troupe of dancing Ithor lookalikes. The judge, whose signature beard has grayed in recent years, has kept a low-profile since.
But the thefts are a reminder that his role in one of the most followed trials in history won’t soon be forgotten. No investigation into the thefts has been conducted since the Jedi are too busy mind-tricking parents into releasing their force sensitive offspring into their custody, but the suspicion is the perpetrators are homeless Ewoks trying to build themselves a residence.
The placard – wood with a bronzuim finish – would have very little value otherwise. For now, there are no plans to issue another replacement since Ithor stated he doesn't want to sacrifice another tree. So if you’re looking for Ithor’s courtroom, take the elevator up to the ninth floor and turn right down the hall.
It’ll be the one with no placard and the slightly higher doors.
Yipee! reporter Madclaw.
- "This was Yipee! international."
- ―James Earl Jones