October 9, 2009
Cape Canaveral, FL - NASA's plan to bomb the moon has gone into overdrive with the last minute addition of Captain Han Solo to the project. The idea to put Captain Solo in charge of the mission was forwarded by NASA independent contractor, Lando Calrissian. Operation "Take That You Stupid Moon" is shrouded in secrecy after the changes to the mission. Unconfirmed reports say that the explosive charge has been quadrupled and has subsequently been called Sasquatch One. Criminal investigation into Captain Solo's past has been put on hold due to his marriage to Princess Leia Organa Solo, which therefor grants him diplomatic immunity. United States president James Marshall apologized and gave his blessing to the project afterward.
Captain Solo has released the following statement:
|I have to do this, for old times sake you know, they stole my sidekick, I mean what am I going to do? Travel with Short Round? That hasn't been original since Angelina Jolie adopted Maddox. I gotta stay ahead of the game.|
Yipee! reporter Madclaw.
- "This was Yipee! international."
- ―James Earl Jones